Guest Post - "Heartache and Hope; Sara-Marie's Story"

We conceived our first child by complete accident. I had been told by doctors and specialists that I may never conceive due to scar tissue on my uterus, so to find out after only being with my (then boyfriend) fiancé for a few months I was so shocked. We had used protection but it failed. After a rough pregnancy first daughter was born vaginally 9 months later in July of 2010 at 41 weeks.

Several months after our first was born I had the Mirena IUD put in. A few months later I had pregnancy symptoms, so to calm my nerves took an at home test... positive. We immediately called the doctors office. They couldn't get me in for a week... Within 24 hours I started cramping and had my first miscarriage. I saw my doctor and had the IUD removed, as now my body was trying to reject it and I had a very unpleasant internal infection... 

About a year or so after our first was born, and only a few months after the IUD nightmare, we decided to try for baby 2. A few months later, a late period, a positive test. Called the doctor. Within 12 hours I started cramping. Second miscarriage. Heart break. This happened 2 more times, bringing my miscarriage total to 4. I demanded every test possible be run to find out why I wasn't carrying past 8 weeks... Turns out I had MRSA, a real pain in the arse type of staph infection that I most likely picked up at the hospital after having my first daughter. More antibiotics. That was November 2011.

Now we're at January 2012. We stopped trying because my heart was still so broken from my 4 losses. I started thinking I might be pregnant again, even though we weren't trying, but wasn't about to get my hopes up again. I got a call from an old friend of mine that week... Another friend I'd grown up with and was close with for 16 years unexpectedly passed away. More heartache. His funeral was in a week. 3 days after the phone call I decided I needed to take a pregnancy test as I was late and had enough to deal with. I figured I was just under a lot of stress. Positive. Great. 3 days after that I went to my friends funeral. I was a wreck. Emotional. Preparing for another miscarriage and saying goodbye to someone I'd seen as family and loved very much. After we got home I called the doctors office, preparing for the telltale cramping to start within 24 hours. Nothing. Went to my doctor and had an ultrasound set up. I was still prepared for the worst. We told no one at this point.

When we went in, we saw a heart fluttering in a little black sack... I couldn't believe it. 5 weeks and 6 days along... Scheduled another ultrasound for about 2 months later along with reoccurring hcg monitoring. Up, up, up. Next ultrasound. Saw her body and little limbs and a strong heart. We were finally having our second baby! At 37 weeks and 4 days I was rushed in for an emergency cesarean. Turned out her umbilical was wrapped around her stomach, shoulder and almost doubled around her neck and was strangling her with every contraction I had. The c-section, and the quick choice of the OB-GYN saved her life. We had our second beautiful daughter in September 2012.

We decided we wanted to wait a few years before trying one more time for a boy. We set August 2015 for our wedding and decided after that would be perfect to try again. 4 months after my second daughter was born a friend brought me into the hospital. I was so dizzy and sick I couldn't walk... So I gave a urine sample, had some blood taken and we waited. As it was late at night they had to phone the doctor to come in. He arrived and came right in. He looked me right in the face, and all calmly and nonchalant he explains to us that there are 3 things going on that could be causing my symptoms. My lymphocytes were elevated, I'm pregnant, and my white blood cell count is high. Umm... Okay... Wait... What?! What was that second thing?! My period wasn't even due to start for approximately 2 days... At the earliest!! Blood work confirmed a few weeks later that I was around 5 weeks. 

At 19 weeks I had severe cramping, I had the runs and was vomiting with contractions. I went to the hospital. I felt like I was in labour. To my horror I was told I was miscarrying, even though baby's heart was strong and I could feel his kicks. The doctor wouldn't even bother to come in and see me. I was told to go home and let it progress. There was nothing they could do. I was beyond devastated... I drove over 2 hours to get to my home town and see my usual doctor. I went to the emergency since it was after hours, where I was rushed for an ultrasound and hooked to IV fluids. Baby was doing just fine. No miscarriage, just severe food poisoning from a steak most likely... Talk about a roller-coaster of emotion... Relief. Anger. Resentment. Frustration. But I'm now 30 weeks with an active little boy. I will be having a scheduled cesarean early November 2013 and having my tubes removed at the same time.

It's been quite the road. Going from believing I'll never be able to have kids, losing 4, and soon to be a mother of 3 beautiful children. If its taught me anything, it's that anything is possible and to not give up. Things happen for a reason, even if that reason isn't clear.

Sara-Marie describes herself as a fluffy stay at home momma of two gorgeous little girls, Madison and Miley, (her M&M's), and a little boy, Lane, on the way. Born and raised in beautiful British Columbia, Canada. Sketching people and painting landscapes are two of her favorite hobbies, but most of all, she loves being a mom, friend, and (soon to be official!) wife! You can check out Sara-Marie's sketches at her website.